This is him at his dedication...a week ago.
I never thought I would feel so complete. My husband and I are best friends, lovers, soul mates...I use to think that I could go through life, not having children and enjoying my friends kids. I had one friend who use to say "We're almost there" that was when her children were small. Once her youngest became independent they were there? I don't want to be there...and are you ever really there...and oh BTW where is there? I think when people have an easy time conceiving their children they take them for granted. They take the whole process of becoming a family and remaining a family for granted. For adoptive parents...it totally different. I had a friend email me and tell me that it wasn't her fault that we couldn't have children. WHAT? who ever said I blamed anyone for what has happened to us. I was just unlucky that way...unlucky...no...LUCKY...look at the child I have now! I couldn't have asked for any other child then him! I couldn't have asked for a more perfect child with wonderful DNA and a birth family that I thankful for. It wasn't and easy road...you can follow our journey to Julian at my other blog http://cocobeanie.blogspot.com
The last 3 months have been the most wonderful time that Jeff and I have had together. We have always been in a wonderful marriage and really didn't need children to complete it but man it sure does help! Last night Jeff was reading Julian a book...Julian was following his voice and looking at the book. What a wonderful moment! I will always treasure that. We have a great routine down for the evening and things flow so well. Jeff and I are on the same page with everything. I was feeding Julian his cereal last night and he kept looking at something, so Jeff took him so he would face me. Well I started to feed him again and all he was doing was laughing (Julian) Which made us laugh too. We both had tears in our eyes. Then it came time for his bottle...my favorite time of the day...his last bottle. He normally snuggles in and settles right down...but for some reason last night he wanted to play. He kept laughing and cooing, smiling and a nuzzle. I called Jeff upstairs and we just played and enjoyed our son. These are the moments to treasure. Not counting down to when you are "almost there"
3 months ago, today, not only did my life change forever but so did another family's life. Julian's birth family. That is a day I will never forget. When our attorney called that day...I was vacuuming the hallway upstairs...as you may remember I did alot of cleaning in July and August...I remember Jeff yelling up the stairs telling me that our attorney was on the phone...30 seconds later we were told together that Julian was born. We were to go to see in the morning. Did we sleep that night...I can't remember. We called all of our family and closest friends to share the news...our life would never be the same. During this time, we have made new friends, lost friends and reconnected with Jeff's cousin and an old friend from high school. Our relationship with God has become closer then ever before. I lean on God more now then ever. When I need to talk to someone, I talk to him. I am not one for Phony believers...that doesn't help anyone. SO if you are going to be a believer...be a true believer. OK..this is getting very heavy now... have a great day!